this is funny if i tell it right.

i'm unemployed. i kinda don't like this, with my prairie lutheran "work is virtue" upbringing, but that's the way it goes. i had things settled to avoid this, but they kinda fell through. as part of this, i am filing for unemployment, y'know, cos we pay in, why not use it when you're in a bind? as part of this, i hafta make 3 "job contacts" each week. i talked to one guy, the guy who had the "job" that became the "not job", and he said it'd become a "job" again on 3 november. cool, but if i wanna collect UI, i hafta keep up the façade of looking for work. so i applied for one job at REI redmond, which, if you don't know yr geography, is "way outa my way no matter which way i live". there was an option to attach my "resume" and i put that "i'm attempting to resume working." um. . .watch this: éèéè. just sayin. another spot asked for "responsibilities and accomplishments", which, since i had just put "mechanic" for my job title, i said i "fix shit. what do you think?" don't think they're callin me back.
the second job posting i found was on craigslist, for marmot "mountain" works in bellevue. which is similar to redmond, geographically--they are a continuous city, in a way, and there are spots in "redmond" that seem more geographically aligned with "bellevue"--except that it's way more uppity and even more dollar filled. the posting was that they were hiring for a "ski technician", willing to train. as in, apparently, right now. i thought, hm. i'm a "ski technician", bored, already trained, could start right now, as we speak. i rolled through belleveue to pick up an application on my way to tapeworm for a spin on my mountainy bicycle. on the way back, i spoke with the manager, explained my "situ", that i could start right now, y'know, cos it's almost ski season, and my friend at sturtevant's in the "fairly sketchy" part of tacoma (as opposed to the "way sketchy" section that you simply don't go to if you're a sheltered rural white kid) is two full weeks out on tunes, and the marmot manager said something to the effect of "we're not actually hiring [wait for it] RIGHT NOW, but sometime in the next few weeks." patronisingly, AS IF I DON'T CHECK THE NOAA FORECAST EVERY DAMN DAY, he added, "y'know, UNTIL IT SNOWS."
three things: 1) if i'm applying to a ski tech job with two seasons of experience, and 27 seasons of skiing, I KNOW WHAT SNOW LOOKS LIKE. I KNOW IT DOESN'T FALL IN GREAT AMOUNTS IN OCTOBER. 2) if a backwater place like tacoma can fill a back shop with two weeks of work before it snows, what can a monied, "outdoor-focused" place like bellevue do, if the store is on top of its game? marmot is the only "backcountry" shop on the eastside until you hit north bend, TWENTY MILES EAST. 3) why the f(*&^( are you posting on craigslist for a ski tech position when you're "not actually hiring right now"? don't get that annoyed look on your face when i say i can start tomorrow. you are looking, at least in theory, to hire someone right away. OTHERWISE, WHY DID YOU POST AN AD TO THAT EFFECT?
some quick admissions. . .i've never managed a "backcountry" retail location. i've managed a bike shop, which is different, i know. i've also been a mechanic, which definitely isn't "management", in both bike retail and ski service, though never in ski retail. supposedly this dude would know better, since he is a "manager" at a "backcountry" retail joint. that said, being a mechanic in a retail "situ", i've seen how to drum up business in an otherwise slow season. the first, biggest, and most effective way to bring people in the door is to have a "special". my grandmother LOVED "specials". so does my mom. SO DOES EVERYONE WHO NEEDS HIS OR HER SKIS TUNED. we just ran a $13 off tune special at the bike shop, POST season, when every good seattlite has totally forgotten his bike, and there were days i couldn't see the end. now, if, PRE season, one were to run this sorta thing, maybe just a $7.50 off tune special, at least you'd get some people through the door. THIS IS NOT A GREAT ECONOMY, if y'all ain't noticed. you MIGHT wanna do something to draw attention to yourself! falsely posting an employment ad on craigslist, while drawing attention to yourself, is NOT the type of attention you are looking for. unless you want to add to your "rep" as THE hip spot to make fun of in the puget sound basin, which apparently the good folks at marmot "mountain" works in bellevue wish to do.