on the clubhouse wall

Dudes. I worked in a Union 76 gas station for a while, too! I guess it is a requirement of Helmet Club. It was back in 1976. I did not work in a 99 cent store in 1999. I remember Lee, the woman who managed the Union 76, telling me how to (in case I ever needed to, which she believed I might) rip the jugular vein right out of an attacking Doberman. By not immediately practicing this skill, I have probably forgotten the details. Lee smoked cigarillos but pretended not to do it near the gas.

People are always trying to teach me things, but I tell them to shut their pie hole because I have plenty of wise things in my head already, and am very busy burning them into pieces of wood with beveled edges. The following are available in router edged wall plaques:



Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.

Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.

Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.




Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.